


If Everybody Had An Ocean

by withhishands



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Surfers, M/M, Surfing, Teen Angst, i wish i knew how to write
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-13
Updated: 2013-11-17
Packaged: 2017-12-29 06:19:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 8,586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1002000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/withhishands/pseuds/withhishands
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mickey hates Chicago. He misses California. He misses surfing and sunburns and the ocean and waking up on the beach and driving down the coast. He misses California immensely. But, he meets Ian Gallagher in Chicago and Ian might be the one thing he doesn't hate about Chicago.</p><p>or, a high school surfing AU full of misunderstandings and pining.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Get Me Away From Here, I'm Dying

**Author's Note:**

> I'm honestly not sure if anything I wrote about Chicago is accurate, so if you're from Chicago, just pretend.
> 
> Also, the entirety of this fic is written. I'm planning on updating hopefully once a week. If I fall behind, let me know on tumblr.

**July**

Mickey hates Chicago. He hates Michigan Avenue and the Bears and weekend warriors and foodies and cab fare and the smell and all the fucking noise. Chicago really is terrible. He's lived in Chicago for nearly seven whole days and he can't bring himself to unpack because that will make it real. More real than the plane ride. More real than seeing the 'for sale' sign in front of his house in Dana. Unpacking means he's staying and he does not want to stay. 

He should be driving down the coast to Capistrano Beach with Sam and Piper, looking for a free stretch of water to surf. He should be just past the impact zone, waiting in the lineup, ready to catch a wave. He should be getting ready to spend the weekend in Sam's car up in Huntington for the US Open of Surfing. Instead, he's face down in his pillow wishing for home. 

 

**August**

School starts in mid-August. Dunbar High is, amazingly enough, not as crowded as Dana Hills High had been. Half of Mickey's classes at Dana had been in portables because they had too many students. Dunbar doesn't have any portables, but Chicago has like forty high schools, so he doubts overcrowding is a thing here. The school has these fancy-looking, high-rise apartments across the street. Mickey wonders how fancy they actually are this deep in the Southside of Chicago with the projects three blocks south. 

Mickey's never been great at making friends; Piper is an anomaly. He's never been great at anything other than surfing. And, what hey, now he's in Chicago. Nowhere near the ocean. Whatever. He sits with a silent crew of mismatched people at lunch who occasionally strike up awkward conversations about television shows. He keeps quiet in classes and at lunch. Mandy, unsurprisingly, makes a dozen friends her first week and he has to sit idly by as they wander in and out of his house because Mandy is perpetually hanging out with someone. 

Mickey has algebra first period and English seventh period. Ian Gallagher is in both classes with Mickey and it's killing him. He's tall, and has broad shoulders and the brightest fucking red hair, and has at least a million friends. Mickey finds out that he made the varsity baseball team as a freshman and maybe isn't the brightest student, but his brother, Lip, is Einstein and tutors him. Mickey sits ahead of Ian in algebra, which is terrible, but he sits a few rows behind him in English, which is not terrible because he can stare. And it's fine. Mickey quietly pines from afar and doesn't make any friends and sits with the television crew at lunch. It's fine. 

Or, it's fine until Mandy starts dating Ian. 

He comes home from skateboarding around the neighborhood to find Ian and Mandy curled up together sickeningly on the couch watching a movie. Mickey does his best to school his expression into one of complete disregard, but he's sure it actually looks like he's sucking on a lemon. Whatever. Mandy starts sitting with Ian and Lip and other important, popular douchebags at lunch, which- Mickey likes the television crew now, so he doesn't care. At all. 

 

**September**

Ian, in addition to being a freak of nature at baseball, is also apparently on the track and field team. The track and field team meet on the track during eighth period instead of a traditional physical education class. It takes Mickey a whole month before he realizes this. He then realizes that playing flag football on the field in the center of the track is infinitely more difficult when all he can focus on is Ian running laps around the track in a tank top and shorts. Mickey really hates Chicago. 

Ian has also taken to hanging out at his house with Mandy right after school. Right after track. Right after a shower.

Mickey has taken to not being at his house after school. 

He likes skateboarding, though, as an empty, half-hearted substitute for surfing. He covers blocks of pavement in the afternoons until he's pretty sure his house is vacant or at least sans Ian. He's never had any desire to head out toward the lake because he thinks it'll just be depressing. A big, giant, flat lake of dirty brown water. When he does make it toward Lake Shore Drive and toward the water, he's surprised at how big it actually is. Mickey is not one to be enamored at large bodies of water that are not the ocean, but he finds himself enamored nonetheless. He can see blue water with denim rips of white moving toward the shore. He lets a wide smile split his face in two. Hurriedly, he pulls his phone out of his pocket and searches for surfing in Chicago. He finds a few beaches that allow surfing and it's basically Christmas. Mickey laughs because he's never been this happy before in Chicago. 

He skates down the pier until he finds a surf shop, Third Coast Surf Shop, set up in a line of local businesses catering to the pier and beach population. Mickey doesn't know how he manages to pull together enough of a personality to convince the store owner, Josh, to let him have a part-time job, but he does. Josh seems cool, though, and very interested in the surf back in California. Mickey is all too eager to tell him every last detail. He gives Mickey a few trial-basis shifts for the following week. 

Mickey wakes up before dawn the next day and manages to skateboard down to the beach with his board tucked under his arm. It's too cold, though, colder than he's used to and comfortable with. It's fine, though. Truly and honestly fine because the possibility is there. He plants his board behind him in the sand and watches the early-morning surfers catch ankle snapper waves, but a wave is a wave and Mickey isn't going to complain. 

He does the same the next two mornings. Once the weekend comes, he figures the beaches will be packed so he wakes up even earlier to beat whatever crowd may come. It's colder and the water is dead flat. Mickey puts his board to the water for the first time in two months, paddles out, and just sits on his board in the freezing water, enjoying the way the salty air makes his face stiff. He's going to need a steamer or at least an upper body wet suit because there's no way he can handle this day after day. 

Working at Third Coast is relatively easy and low-key and there's a restaurant next door that makes a great turkey club. Josh is apparently pleased with Mickey because he gives him more shifts after the "trial-basis". Mickey won't paddle out again until he's got a steamer, but he still wakes up early to watch the other surfers lineup. 

There are about six surfers who lineup every morning, with a few flounders out there, just splashing around in the lineup and not catching any waves. Mickey assumes the small number means it really is too cold out for most people. Either that or there's a better beach somewhere that Mickey doesn't know about. He likes this beach, though. It's close to Third Coast and probably the closest to the school, where Mickey skateboards to immediately after watching the morning waves. 

It's still relatively early on a Tuesday morning. Mickey has a good forty minutes before he has to hit the pavement and head for the high school. He pushes his frozen fingers into the sand because he can and turns his head to spy on two latecomers to the morning's session. And Mickey really hates Chicago because of course the two latecomers are Ian and Lip. They aren't in full steamers, more like a cross between a steamer and a spring suit, with full leg coverage and half arm coverage. It's a good look for Ian, obviously. 

No one snakes their waves when it's their turn in the lineup. Mickey guesses either people are just nicer here in Chicago or Ian and Lip are regulars. Ian goes first and is annoyingly good. Even on a mediocre wave, Ian carves it like a professional. Lip is next and Mickey so badly wants to see him wipeout, which naturally means he doesn't so much as stutter on a movement. 

Ian and Lip paddle back to the shore just before Mickey has to hit the road for school. Mickey gets distracted watching Ian peel his wetsuit down his torso and shake the excess water from his hair. And Mickey is definitely staring and Ian is definitely looking right at him. Ian gives Mickey a nod of acknowledgment before following Lip up toward the showers. Mickey curses and blushes and tries to make it to school on time. 

Mickey gets paid on the last Thursday in September and spends almost all of it on a wetsuit and board wax. He introduces himself the next morning to the lineup of surfers and they're definitely nicer to Mickey than Mickey had been to new kids back in California. 

Mickey surfs. And surfs. And surfs. He surfs until he forgets he's in Chicago and that the waves he's catching are lake waves instead of ocean waves. He surfs until he's happy. He surfs until he's aching. He's beat down every day when he shows up at school, but he's so fucking happy that it doesn't matter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> withhishands.tumblr.com


	2. Floating Vibes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for posting late!

**October**

Ian is still surfing in the morning, but Mickey doesn't know where. He is sure he could just ask Ian where he surfs in the morning, but Mickey is a wimp and hasn't ever actually talked to Ian. Mickey just knows that he shows up in first period algebra either fresh from the shower or still covered in a layer of salt. Mickey especially likes the mornings that he's covered in lake salt because he smells like the beach when he passes by Mickey's desk. 

Mickey is working when Ian shows up at Third Coast with a small red headed girl in tow. 

"Hey man," Ian says, smiling and leaning on the counter. The girl hangs out a step behind him, her eyes wandering around the store. "I didn't know you worked here."

"Yeah, almost a month." Mickey regrets that those are his first words to Ian. He clears his throat and nods at the girl. "Your sister?"

"Debbie," Ian says, nodding. She smiles at Mickey and wanders toward a row of boards. "She claims to want to learn how to surf."

"Claims," Debbie echoes with blatant annoyance. "I want to learn. Don't listen to him. What size board do I need?"

Mickey pulls himself up from his stool behind the counter and steers them toward the back wall. Debbie refuses to get a beginner's board until Ian says, "This looks like my first board. You remember it, Debs, the orange one?" Mickey gets her to agree to a light blue, soft-shell board that has great buoyancy and contours on the bottom to help her catch waves easier. Mickey's never tried a beginner's board out. They're carved and built to be stable and to make the rider feel confident. Mickey's first board was his uncle's old long board, heavy as shit and turned on a dime. It was the worst possible board to learn on, but Mickey rode that board until the fiberglass resin got so thin, the board cracked and sent Mickey acid dropping down a wave. 

Ian carries the board to the front while Mickey grabs an ankle strap and a wetsuit. 

"You surfed a lot in California?" Ian asks while Mickey is writing up the surfboard paperwork. 

"You could say that," Mickey snorts. He gives Ian a copy of the paperwork and tells him there isn't a warranty on the board. He might also add in that if anything does happen to the board, Ian should bring it back in anyway and Mickey can try to fix it. Debbie ends up buying a handful of beaded bracelets with the dollars she has crumpled in her pockets. Mickey throws in a bogus charm to attach to the string on one of the bracelets and she smiles more. Which is great because it makes Ian smile. Mickey is very pro Ian smiling. 

"So, listen," Ian says before they leave. "We're heading up to this beach in Wisconsin this weekend to surf, me and Lip and Debbie. Do you, uh, wanna come?" 

Mickey can't. He promised Josh that he could cover weekends. Of course, when he made that promise, there wasn't an impending trip to the beach with Ian to consider. And, it's weird, right? Going to a beach in Wisconsin with Ian and his family seems weird. The other weird thing being that Ian is dating his sister and, until now, hasn't spoken a word to Mickey. That's weird. What if Mandy is taking pity on him and making Ian invite him because Mickey is friendless? That seems less weird and way more plausible. 

"Sounds cool," Mickey says. "If I can get off work."

Mickey might ask for the weekend off. Maybe. (Probably, definitely.) But, he's definitely going to ask Mandy if she's trying to set him up with friends because he's not into pity. If by some miracle Ian actually is asking him to spend the weekend at the beach with his brother and sister, then. Well, then he'll deal with that when he gets there. 

On Monday in first period, Mickey isn't expecting Ian to slide into the seat behind him, tap him on the shoulder, and ask, "Did ya get the days off?" Mickey shakes his head and says he hasn't had a chance to ask yet. Ian doesn't move. He just sits in the seat behind him where Ronald the desk shaker usually sits. It's fine. Mickey isn't at all concerned that the back of his head is ugly. 

Monday is actually a day of things Mickey isn't expecting. Ian walks down the hallway with him after algebra, talking about how poorly he did on the last exam, even with Lip's help. Ian volunteers his schedule and seems stoked to realize that Mickey's Spanish class is in the same hallway as Ian's sign language class. Before he darts left down a hallway, Ian says, "Wait for me after Spanish. We'll go to lunch together," and disappears in a crowd of people. 

Mickey is one thousand percent sure that Mandy is interfering in his life. He's never just made a friend from helping them pick out a surfboard. Mickey is friends with Sam because he's the only good-looking gay surfer who isn't out, and he's friends with Piper because she decided they were friends when they were twelve. That's it. That's Mickey full register of friends. 

He corners Mandy in the hallway between third and fourth period. She denies playing a part, which Mickey actually believes because she looks horrified that Mickey is hanging out with her friends. Mickey allows himself a momentary, internal freak-out that Ian totally wants to hang out with him. He grounds that thinking quickly because, whatever reason Ian has for asking Mickey to the beach, it isn't for the same reason Mickey wants to go. That sobers him enough to make it through Spanish and act cool in the hallway while he waits for Ian. 

Lunch is different. He doesn't sit with the television crew because Ian tells him to grab a seat at his table after they work their way through the lunch line. Lip and Mandy sit at the same table, along with three other baseball players and two unidentified girls. Everyone kind of nods and accepts Mickey's installation at their table. He wonders if the television crew will miss him. 

The rest of the week follows this trend. Mickey wakes up early, surfs, and then goes to school, where he is apparently now a member of Ian's crew. He works on Wednesday and Thursday and Josh is understanding about the weekend. He says he'd do the same thing for a surfing weekend. Mickey texts Ian because Ian gave him his number and said to text him when he talked to Josh. It's fine. Mickey writes and rewrites the text about seven times before settling on _got the days off_ , which is lame and - It's fine. 

 

**Wisconsin**

They leave Friday after school. The drive is two and a half hours long, but it's entertaining. Debbie coerces him into playing cards in the backseat and the music is a weird mix of Tom Waits and Craig Mack that has Mickey laughing. The beach reminds him of the beaches back home in the early morning because there's a layer of fog over the water and it's wonderfully empty. Mickey helps Lip carry their bags down onto a patch of dry sand, where the water won't reach when the tide rolls in. Debbie only grabs her surfboard and makes Ian start teaching her. 

They don't bother unpacking anything because they only have limited hours of daylight. He and Lip suit up and paddle out. His intelligence is fiercely obvious after a few hours of taking turns catching waves. He's a great surfer because he loves it and he fully understands it. He understands the physics of the board and it's interactions with the water. Mickey's always relied on feeling, but it's clear with Lip that it's a durable combination of feeling and knowledge that make him great. 

The waves are decent, definitely bigger than they are down in Chicago. They get a few long waves that break into perfect sections that he and Lip ride at the same time. The surf dies down, rolling in chubby waves with no breaks to ride. Mickey glances back at the shore to see Ian and Debbie jumping up and down on their boards on the sand while Ian shows Debbie how to pump the board and pop up. Lip waves them out while it's not too rough. Debbie is slow at paddling out, but Ian stays with her. They paddle out just past the impact zone, where Mickey and Lip are sitting on their boards. 

A few ankle breaker waves come in that Debbie tries to catch, but she turns down too fast and the tail of her board keeps nicking the lip of the wave, sending her flying off her board. She's not discouraged, though. When it gets too dark out to properly surf, they paddle back to the shore. Debbie is excited at the prospect of a whole day of surfing tomorrow and promptly passes out in the tent after Ian gets it set up. 

Debbie is the only one who sleeps in the tent. Mickey, Lip, and Ian fall asleep on the sand, in their sleeping bags and it's probably the most content Mickey's felt in a while. 

A small fire is going when Mickey wakes up. Lip has a grill rack in the center of the low flames with a deep frying pan resting on top. Debbie is awake, still tired with a blanket wrapped around her shoulders, sitting on a towel near the fire. Mickey crawls out of his sleeping bag, rolls it up, and offers to help Lip. Lip nods and passes him the spatula. Mickey prods the eggs and bacon while Lip lights up a cigarette. 

"Got a spare?" Mickey asks, his voice rough from sleep. Lip pulls another cigarette from his pack and passes it to Mickey with a lighter. After the eggs and bacon are done, he splits them up for Lip and Debbie and starts another panful for himself and Ian. Mickey eats and leaves Ian's half in the pan next to the fire. Debbie stays back on the beach and waits for Ian to wake up before trying to surf again. 

Mickey and Lip spend most of the morning on the water until they dehydrate from the salt water and from sweating. They take a beach break and down most of the gallon-sized water jug they packed. Ian spent the morning with Debbie going over how to hop up on the board and how to keep the board more parallel with the crest of the wave so she doesn't axe out like she had the previous day. They play a short game of frisbee until everyone is too hungry to keep moving. Mickey and Ian take the car into town and find a diner that packs them up four roast beef sandwiches to go. 

There's a camp of people kind of close to them when they get back that politely wave at them. Ian waves back and nearly drops the two sandwiches he's holding. Mickey falls asleep with an arm over his eyes after they eat. He naps for a good hour and a half and paddles out with everyone else when he wakes up. They call him _sleepy_ for the rest of the day. Debbie does tenfolds better today than she had yesterday. She catches a picture-perfect wave and rides it until it completely breaks. Mickey claps and cheers with her brothers and offers up a fist bump when she paddles back out to them. She still swallows her fair share of salt water, but she smiles the whole afternoon. 

Lip gets the fire big when they pack in for the evening. They roast hotdogs on sticks and eat potato salad out of cartons for dinner. Ian pulls out chocolate, graham crackers, and marshmallows from a bag and sets up a s'more station of sorts. Lip invites the group next to them over for s'mores and beer. One of the girls latches onto Ian's side for the night, leaving Mickey quietly brooding on the opposite side of the fire. One of the guys from the group, Walt, brings Mickey another beer and plants himself in the sand next to Mickey. He's easy enough to talk to and mildly funny and takes his mind off of Ian for a few hours. The other camp departs eventually. Mickey volunteers to smother the fire while everyone else settles in to sleep. 

Mickey tries not to think about it on Sunday. He knows he can't be mad or anything at Ian because he's not gay and not interested in Mickey, but it still hurts in an awful, teenage way that Mickey doesn't know how to deal with. Mickey and Ian pack up the camp while Lip takes Debbie out onto the water. He and Ian dart out to the water without taking the time to pull their wetsuits on, but the water's surprisingly warmed from the sun. They get an hour of waves in before everyone swims back to the beach and helps pack the car. 

They get home in the early afternoon, which gives Mickey enough time to do his weekend homework and attempt to push Ian from his mind. 

 

**October Again**

School gets demanding because midterms are approaching and the teachers are making a huge deal out of it. Mickey studies with Ian at lunch and with his lab partner, Jamie, after school. He surprisingly feels prepared for midterms when they roll around. He surfs the morning of midterms to relax and shows up for algebra ready. Ian comes in with dry hair, which is different, because he usually shows up with wet hair, either from a shower or from the salt water of Lake Michigan. (Mickey really wishes Ian would invite him to his morning surf spot.) He gives Mickey a weary smile before falling into the desk behind him. 

"Shit," Ian says after class. "I thought I was going to bomb that. I barely slept last night. But that wasn't bad, you know?" 

Mickey agrees and silently wonders why Ian barely slept last night. Mandy wasn't home at all last night and he hates putting two and two together. 

The rest of his midterms pass quickly. He feels confident about all of them except Spanish, but he's doing well in that class aside from that, so even a bad grade won't make him completely fail. Ian stops into Third Coast when Mickey is working on Sunday and hangs out for a few hours. It's so devastatingly normal and friendly that it makes Mickey sad. He's resigned to the fact that he's Ian's friend. He's one of Ian's many bros and that's all. It's not terrible, but it's certainly not ideal. He doesn't know what the ideal scenario would be, either, so he sucks it up and keeps up the friendly conversations. 

The week after midterms is relaxing as far as school goes. His chemistry teacher gives them a few days of videos before diving into a new chapter. Mickey's pissed that he once at the beginning of the year helped the chemistry teacher fix the connection from the computer to the projector because now every time he has a technical issue, he calls on Mickey to help. During one of the video days, he asks Mickey to take a look at his laptop because he has a virus and he doesn't know what to do. Mickey spends the class period running a virus scanner and is amazed that the scanner found twenty four trackers and malware. He doesn't even try to figure out how he got that much shit on his computer. Mickey sets up an auto-scan time and hands the laptop back. 

Ian and Lip call him the _IT Department_ for the rest of the week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimers: I have zero working knowledge of surfing. I have never been to Chicago. I know nothing about Chicago's laws on surfing. I made up a beach in Wisconsin. For the purposes of this story, Wisconsin is a totally happening place for the youth of Chicago to surf at. Also for the purposes of this story, Wisconsin is totally cool with people camping on the beach. As I understand it, Chicago can get pretty cold in October. October in this story isn't quite that cold. Because I didn't want it to be. 
> 
> This story is so AU, it's not even funny. Mickey grew up in southern California and his dad isn't a huge dick, so I'm not making him quite as terrified of his own sexual orientation as he really is. I'm also pretty much not including Terry at all because I don't like him. So, for the purposes of this story, Mickey is more or less okay with being gay, but not super into being in an openly gay relationship because it's still Chicago and he's not an idiot. I know I wrote in Ian just buying a surfboard for Debbie, even though they're actually super expensive, so lets just say he's getting the funds from an outside source. Cough, cough. 
> 
> withhishands.tumblr.com
> 
> Come talk to me!


	3. Old Pine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: I have made a huge mistake. The Great Lakes are not salty. For the purposes of this story, until I get around to editing it, they are salty. I live on the coast of Florida, where salt is basically in the air, and didn't think twice about it. For that, I apologize.

**November**

It eventually gets too cold to surf, which is something Mickey isn't used to. No matter how cold it got in California, it never got cold enough to not surf. Mickey gets lazy because he doesn't have to wake up early in the morning. Ian is going through the same thing because they both come in more tired than usual without the water to wake them up. Ian complains about it and says, "It must suck extra for you. I bet it never got cold in California." 

Josh closes the store for a week during the first snow of the season and flies down to Mexico. Mickey hates him a little. What is he supposed to do for the week with no surfing and no work? He skateboards on the salted roads until he can't feel his limbs from the cold. He gets home earlier than he usually does and walks in on Mandy and Lip fucking on the couch. It's a sight Mickey could have lived without. Mandy apologizes later, leaning sheepishly in the doorway to Mickey's room. Mickey tries his best to not sound annoyed when he asks if Mandy is Gallagher hopping her way through the family. 

"Gallagher hopping?" Mandy repeats. "I've been dating Lip for, like, two months."

Mandy says she's just friends with Ian. And, yeah, okay, maybe he never saw them kiss and neither said they were dating. Not really. Which, fine, whatever. She just had an oddly clingy relationship with Ian in a totally platonic way and is now screwing Lip. Mickey doesn’t care. 

The rest of the month is monotonous. Josh comes back and Mickey goes back to work, but it's slower than usual because of the weather. Ian stops in at least twice a week and sits opposite Mickey at the counter to hang out. He seems like he's got something on his mind, but he doesn't elaborate past, "My older sister just started dating this guy, and he's, I don't know." Mickey doesn't make him develop his concerns, just nods and commiserates. 

"My sister's dating a jerk, too," Mickey says with a cheeky smile. Ian smiles at that. 

 

**December**

The snow is miserable. Mickey is back to his constant mood of hating Chicago. End of semester exams approach and pass quickly. Mickey is all too ready to settle in for winter break in front of the television, playing video games. He takes a break on Christmas day and opens gifts with his sister, brother, and dad. He and Iggy attempt to make pot roast for dinner and it doesn't turn out half bad, so they call it a success. Mandy tries to get Mickey to go to the Gallaghers' with her the day after Christmas, but he declines. He works the days between Christmas and New Years and mainly tends to people returning Christmas gifts. 

 

**January**

Mickey's mildly glad to be back in school because Ian is happy to see him and that counts for something. They don't get a chance to exchange break stories because their algebra teacher introduces so much new material, Mickey's head spins. His history teacher has pity on them, though, and shows a boring and welcome documentary on the Reconstruction Era. Mickey makes the mistake of thinking that having a substitute teacher in chemistry means an easy day, but it's the opposite. Their chemistry teacher is out with the flu. The substitute says she'll be with them all week and then assigns a research paper. Who assigns research papers in chemistry? Substitutes who used to be English teachers, apparently. She lets them pair up for the paper. 

Mickey spends his lunches in the library with Jamie. Their paper is on Joseph Black, the guy who figured out that animals produce carbon dioxide. Jamie's great, too. She's smart and doesn't think being stuck with Mickey for labs is awful. There are worst people he could consider friends. They get their paper completely done Friday at lunch and turn it in between sixth and seventh period. 

One of the guys who Mickey sits with at lunch, Chris, one of the baseball players, leans over to Mickey during English (because after Mickey and Ian started hanging out, Ian's whole crew of friends sort of migrated to where Mickey sits in English) and says, "Dude, that chemistry paper sucked, right?" Mickey snorts out a laugh and nods. "I'm glad my lab partner's that Caesar kid because I'd have failed without him." Mickey knows Caesar; he'd been in the television crew Mickey sat with at lunch. Chris says something else that Mickey doesn't catch because their teacher comes in, but he catches the next line. "Anyway, there's a party at my place tonight. You comin'?" Mickey shrugs and nods, says he'll be there. 

The party is chill and Mickey definitely gets drunk. He plays on Chris's team for flip-cup and does surprisingly well. Ian dips out early because he isn't feeling okay. Chris lets Mickey crash on his couch for the night and he goes out for food with Chris and a few other baseball players in the morning. 

Ian is still sick when Monday comes around and Mickey misses him at lunch. He hasn't really seen or hung out with Ian since before Christmas break, he realizes. Just brief interactions between classes. He's glad to see Ian come into Third Coast on Saturday and hang out for the day. They complain about the weather out loud and plan another trip up to Wisconsin once the weather turns. 

 

**February**

The weather is terrible all the time and Mickey is contemplating skipping town and Kerouac-ing his way to Mexico. Ian is out half the week toward the end of February and comes back without any kind of explanation. He just says he had to go out of town. Ian has baseball tryouts and makes the varsity team again. Mickey sees less and less of him as their practices get more frequent.

 

**March**

Midterms come around in mid-March and Mickey passes all of them. The snow stops completely and the temperature gets more bearable. Mickey suits up in his full steamer and paddles out for the first time since November. It's still freezing, but Mickey powers through it. Ian shows up at Mickey's stretch of beach one morning and asks Mickey why he doesn't surf with him and Lip in the morning. "Our beach is way less crowded," Ian says. 

"I don't know where you surf," Mickey says, shrugging, like it hasn't been bothering him forever. 

Ian smiles and laughs and tells him where it is. Mickey shows up at their beach the next morning and it's actually way better. It's just himself, Ian, Lip, and an older guy named Vinny. Vinny's from South Carolina and talks trash about lake surfing that Mickey can't help but laugh at. 

Mickey goes to Ian's baseball games when he doesn't have to work. The team isn't the greatest, but they seem to win enough games to not be embarrassing. Mandy is always looking around during the games, searching for someone. Mickey can't imagine who she's looking for because he's pretty sure everyone they know is in the group they're sitting with. "Shut up," she says when Mickey comments on it. "I'm trying to figure out who Ian's dating."

Dating. Mickey looks around with her. He's pretty sure he would notice if Ian started dating someone. He then reminds himself that he didn't realize that Ian wasn't dating his own sister, so he might not be the best judge. Mandy says it's not someone from school and that all she knows is that the guy's name is Ned. Guy, Mickey's head repeats.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is late! I had a huge Finance exam that I am finally finished with (and that I did very poorly on), so hopefully that won't happen again and everything will happen on a more timely schedule. 
> 
> Thank you!!
> 
> withhishands.tumblr.com


	4. Danse Caribe

**Wisconsin**

They all skip school on the first Friday of the month and drive up to Wisconsin. Mandy comes on the trip this time, borrowing one of Mickey's old boards. She never took a real interest in surfing like Mickey had when they were younger, but Mickey remembers teaching her how to. She can handle herself decently on a board when she tries, though, and seems to enjoy herself. Debbie is still a little shaky on her board, especially with months of no practice. Mickey tells her to push her left foot farther back on the board the next time she pops up to see if a wider stance helps at all with her steering. Amazingly, it does. That had been Mickey's biggest issue on a board; he'd stand with his feet too close together. It takes a few waves for Debbie to get used to keeping her foot back, but she gets it eventually and thanks Mickey with a huge grin on her face. 

It isn't until Ian is yelling for them to come back to shore that he realizes it's just been him and Debbie out on the water for close to an hour. Lip and Mandy bring back lunch for everyone and then disappear after. It isn't difficult to figure out what they're off doing. Mickey falls asleep again after lunch while Ian and Debbie surf. Lip and Mandy are back when Mickey wakes up. 

The day is pretty exhausting. Debbie falls asleep on a towel right after the sun drops. Mandy wakes her up, moves her into the tent, and they both fall asleep. 

"No sex in the tent," Ian snarks when Lip announces he's going to sleep. Lip flips him off and crawls into the tent with Mandy and Debbie. Ian grabs them beers and settles against his sleeping bag roll, prodding the fire with a stick. Ian's phone goes off about seven thousand times and each chime just makes Mickey angrier and sadder because it's probably Ned. What a stupid fucking name, anyway. 

"S'that your boyfriend?" Mickey hears himself ask. 

Ian frowns and says, "Not really. He's just a guy I've been, uh, seeing." He ducks his head and looks away from Mickey. Mickey can't help the way he repeats guy you've been seeing with a choked laugh. Ian mistakes Mickey's disbelief with disgust and says, "I never thought you'd be a homophobe." He throws down the prodding stick and takes off down the beach. Mickey doesn't go after him. 

Saturday is tense. He and Lip surf the waves a set down from where Ian is helping Debbie. Mandy stays on the beach all morning, sunbathing. If Lip knows anything about last night, he doesn't say anything. Mandy goes shopping by herself and comes back with enough food for lunch and dinner today and breakfast and lunch tomorrow. The water goes glassy in the afternoon and the waves that roll in are perfect. Lip shouts, "Outside!" when he spots a big set coming that's breaking farther out. Mickey forgets all about Ian because he hasn't had a surf session this good since he left California. The good waves get blown out from wind and the surf turns choppy. They turn back to the shore and stay beached for the rest of the evening. 

Ian sleeps in the tent with Debbie and Mandy that night, leaving Lip and Mickey side-by-side in their sleeping bags on the sand. 

"You not okay with Ian being gay?" Lip asks into the silent night. He doesn't sound angry or accusing, just curious. 

"That's definitely not it, man," Mickey says. 

Mickey's pretty sure Lip works it out, because Lip is fucking smart and because Lip says, "You don't really give off a gay vibe." Mickey wants to say that neither does Ian, but Lip keeps talking. "You can't get mad at him for not wanting to ruin your friendship or whatever by asking you out."

Armed with that knowledge, Sunday is tough to get through. Mickey surfs like he's caught in a fish net. He can't seem stay up on his board. He feels heavy and nauseous because he's worried that he really screwed shit up with Ian. Ian doesn't talk to him, or even really look at him, all day. Mickey packs the car up early just to get off the water. 

Mandy drives home because everyone else is too tired. Debbie falls asleep on Mickey's shoulder in the back seat, and Lip falls asleep next to her against the window. Mickey doesn't mind because it reminds Mickey of Mandy when she was younger. Except with Ian's hair. Mickey tries out his best apologetic smile on Ian when he turns around in the passenger seat to spy on his sleeping siblings. Ian frowns, but nods, seemingly accepting Mickey's quasi-apology. 

 

**April**

Ian doesn't want to talk about the beach, but he doesn't shut Mickey out. Everything is more or less the same and Mickey can't decide if he's okay with that. He feels like his entire life changed with that weekend in Wisconsin, but nothing has actually changed. He still surfs with Ian and Lip in the morning, and Ian still sits behind him in Algebra, and he still walks to lunch with Ian after Spanish, and he still hangs out with Ian and the baseball players at lunch, and Ian still sits next to him in English. Ian even shows up at the shop on Friday afternoon and says they're having a party after the game tonight at Lucky's house and that Mickey should come. 

It's all sickeningly normal. 

Except Mickey feels like he and Ian are just going through the motions. Like they're stuck in momentum and just can't suddenly stop. Objects in motion tend to stay in motion. 

Toward the middle of April, Mickey's chemistry teacher puts on a video about Chernobyl and asks Mickey to look at his laptop again. Mickey tells him he has got to stop clicking on shit. He opens up the scanner and searches for an adware removal tool because his teacher somehow managed to install 180Search Assistant onto the laptop and it's producing popups like crazy. He removes the adware and lets the scanner finish out a routine scan. He tries to watch the documentary for a few minutes, but it's boring as hell. He makes the decision to snoop around on the laptop while the scanner runs. He finds hundreds of family photos of his teacher, his wife, and his two sons. Mickey recognizes Ian's older sister in a few of the more recent albums, apparently dating the younger son, the one Ian wasn't thrilled about. 

He finds a folder titled Other, opens it, and clicks on a folder titled Canada. He nearly falls out of his seat because Ian is in these pictures. Seventy pictures of Ian and his chemistry teacher in Canada. Arms around each other. Individual shots of them in front of statues and odd fountains. Pictures of them together taken by strangers. Pictures of them taken MySpace style. A few memorable and sickening photos of Ian against a backdrop of sheets without a shirt. 

The virus scan finishes and Mickey exits out of everything before giving the laptop back to Dr. Lishman. Ned Lishman, Mickey thinks. The Ned that Ian is screwing. The Ned that fucking teaches Mickey how to balance equations and is like fifty thousand years old. Mickey practically runs out of class. 

He dodges Ian for two weeks. He spends his lunches in the library or on the baseball field with Jamie. 

He spends the last weekend in April on Lake Michigan, away from any of his usual spots. It's nice because being on the water makes him feel better and calmer and sort of at peace with himself. Mickey can kind of make the rest of the world disappear. He spends a few endless moments missing California, missing the ocean, missing Sam. He makes the decision to buy a ticket to go to California when school gets out in May. He needs to go back, if only for a week. He texts Sam and orders a plane ticket when he gets shoreside. 

He feels better when he gets back to school on Monday. He doesn't avoid Ian or Lip and maybe even manages to smile a few times. He goes to a few baseball games and cheers when Ian or Chris or Lucky make a good play. He's fine. He's got California to look forward to. He's got summer to look forward to. He pushes Ian and Dr. Lishman out of his mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for that chapter.
> 
> The last chapter is finished, technically. I'm quite unhappy with it, so I'm going to try to tweak it a little before I post it next week. Apologies in advance for late posting. 
> 
> withhishands.tumblr.com


	5. King of the Beach

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is awful and short and I sort of resolved everything in a hand-wavy way, but whatever.

**May**

They get assigned a ridiculous project in chemistry with ten, unidentified, clear liquids in small tubes. He and Jamie have a week to correctly identify all the liquids by subjecting them to different tests. It's stressing Mickey out. He contemplates blackmailing Lishman into passing him and Jamie, but Ian probably would never forgive him and Mickey still cares about what Ian thinks of him. Jamie sits with Mickey at lunch to discuss what kind of torture they should impose on their liquids because the library is getting old. Mickey ends lunch on Wednesday by slamming his head into the table and cursing how much he hates chemistry. 

"What's got you so stressed out?" Ian asks Thursday on their walk from fourth period to lunch. 

"Your boyfriend is killing me with this damn lab assignment," Mickey groans. Ian freezes next to him. Mickey stops walking and turns to face Ian. "Yeah, I know about your little affair with the chemistry teacher.” Mickey tries to not let his annoyance seep into his words. He sighs and forces himself to let go of the fleeting surge of jealously. "C'mon, we're gonna get a terrible spot in the lunch line."

Ian pulls him to the side of the hallway instead, his hand hot around Mickey's wrist, and practically begs Mickey to not say anything. "I know you're not really okay with me being gay, and I'm fine with that, but please don't tell anyone. I don't want him to lose his job."

"Jesus, I'm not going to say anything," Mickey snaps. He yanks his wrist back. Ian's concern about Ned is making him sad and he tries to walk away. 

"Mickey," Ian says, pleading, and catches up to Mickey in the hallway. "You don't hate me, do you?"

"Fuck," Mickey mutters. "I don't hate you, okay? And I'll keep my mouth shut, so just- shut up about it, okay?"

Things change after that. They change like the way Mickey had expected things to change after the last trip to Wisconsin. Ian gets distant and stops hanging around the shop. They don't really change their routine, though. They still sit together in algebra and English. Mickey still sits at the lunch table. They just don't talk. Ian stops surfing in the morning; Mickey can tell by his hair in first period. Lip finds him in the mornings on the beach and surfs silently alongside him. 

Mickey amazingly passes all of his classes. It's the first year he's managed all A's and B's (except for a C in Spanish, but he'd been expecting that) since he was in middle school. He's oddly proud of himself. He spends a few days surfing with Lip before he's due to leave for California. Mandy drives him out to the airport on the last day of May and Mickey's tempted to flip Chicago off as his plane departs. 

 

**June**

Being in California again makes Mickey feel lighter and more like himself. He takes a cab from the airport directly to the beach in Dana Point. It's crowded and sunny and the swell is huge. Mickey takes off his shoes and sits down on the hot sand. He never wants to leave. He calls Sam and convinces him into picking Mickey up from the beach because he's too lazy and happy to walk to Sam's house. 

Being in Sam's house is comforting in a way Mickey hadn't been expecting. He used to hate Sam's house because it was big and charmless, but just about everything in California is comforting to Mickey right now. Sam cooks up some fish he caught yesterday out on the pier and boxed rice. They eat outside on the patio because the weather is absurdly nice. After dinner, Mickey nearly shoves Sam into bed and gets laid for the first time in a year. 

There's absolutely nothing wrong about Mickey's week in California. They spend three days surfing the coast down, sleeping on the beach, until they hit Mexico and have to turn around. They drive out to the desert because Mickey misses the breath-shortening heat of it. They spend one day completely inside of Sam's house doing nothing but having sex. Piper drives down from San Francisco for Mickey's last two days in town, punches him in the arm for being lazy with his emailing, and tries to snake all of his waves. 

Even though the week was essentially perfect, Mickey is surprisingly okay with flying back to Chicago. And, yeah, a lot of it has to do with Ian. Mickey tells himself he needs to make things right with Ian and properly apologize. But, it's also everything else. He has friends in Chicago and a life and a shitty stretch of beach, but they're all his own. He needed this trip to California to say goodbye to it. The second time he makes the flight from California to Illinois, he's about eighty percent happier than he had been the first time.

Only eighty because Chicago is still fucking cold as shit. 

Josh gives Mickey a mess of shifts when he gets back because Josh is doing half-time at the shop and half-time at the beach and Mickey understands completely. His paycheck every week is fat and so totally worth the extra hours. 

 

**July**

Mickey knows he needs to talk to Ian. He’s been trying to figure out what to say to him for the better part of a month and has nothing. Every time he gets to Ian’s beach and sees him out on the water, he panics and turns around. The few times he’s seen Lip hanging out around the house with Mandy, he doesn’t bring Ian up. Mickey wears himself out during the day with surfing and working and skateboarding and hopes that by the time night comes, he’s tired enough to not dwell on the Ian situation too long. 

Mickey works a Tuesday in the middle of the month by himself. He flips the closed sign for lunch and gets a turkey sandwich from the restaurant next door and eats in the shop at the counter. Someone tries the still-locked door to the shop and then knocks on the glass. 

It’s Ian. He waves at Mickey through the glass door and smiles a little lopsidedly. Mickey ignores the way his stomach flips. Mickey unlocks the door to let Ian in and re-locks it after. 

"Hey," Mickey says tightly, unsure of what to say. 

"Hey," Ian echoes softly. He sits down on a barstool at the counter, just like he always used to, like nothing has changed. "How was California?"

Mickey hesitates and then tries to give him the long-story-short version of his trip, but Ian keeps asking questions and forcing Mickey into the actual long story. It seems normal. Or, normal for them. Ian seems interested and he definitely doesn't seem mad. He even kind of suggests that they should all take a trip to California when it gets too cold to surf in Chicago during winter break. Ian says he's never actually seen the ocean before, which is the saddest thing Mickey's ever heard, so he says now they have to take a trip to California. 

"I'm sorry," Mickey says when their conversation dies down. He swallows a few times. "For, uh- a lot of stuff."

"Yeah, me too."

"Um," Mickey says. "How was your summer? Are you still seeing-" Mickey trails off, not wanting to finish his sentence.

"No," Ian says. He looks down at his hands. "It was a little too stressful. I don't like sneaking around."

Mickey tries to think of something to say that would convey what he's feeling accurately. He really just wants to tell Ian that he's super gay and wants to bang the shit out of him, but it seems inappropriate. Mickey knows he can do better this upcoming year. He can be a real friend to Ian and not get mad at him every time he dates someone new and be someone he talks to when he starts fucking, like, their PE coach or something. Mickey almost lets everything go unsaid, except-

Except he doesn’t want that. His stomach drops and he feels slightly dizzy. He doesn’t want that at all. In a rush of what Mickey’s labeling as bravery, he stands up and walks around the counter. Ian spins in his barstool to follow Mickey’s movement. 

Mickey presses himself between Ian’s spread knees until the fronts of his thighs hit the stool Ian’s sitting on. He grabs Ian’s face with his fingers and kisses him. It’s not very smooth and it’s a little messy, but Ian kisses him back. He wraps his hands around Mickey’s hip bones and pulls him closer until they’re flush against each other. When Mickey breaks the kiss because he needs air, Ian sucks in a breath and laughs it back out. He rests his forehead against Mickey’s chest. Mickey holds his hands out awkwardly, unsure of what to do with them. He tries to set them on Ian’s shoulders, but it’s still weird. 

Ian tilts his head back to look up at Mickey. Mickey forgets about his hands and kisses Ian again because he can’t help himself. 

Someone knocks on the door and Mickey spins around guiltily. 

He unlocks the door and spins the closed sign back to open. Ian waits until the customer leaves before speaking again. 

“Are you in the closet?” Ian asks. 

Mickey shrugs. “Mandy knows,” he says in lieu of a real answer. 

“So, you’re not just, like, test-driving being gay with me, right?” Ian asks. 

Mickey laughs. He’s not entirely sure what Ian means by that, but he knows the answer is no. He shakes his head.

“Good,” Ian says with a wide smile. 

“Good,” Mickey echoes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is technically the end, but I'm writing a porny sequel. Thanks for sticking with me through this! I know it has plot holes and is a complete mess, but I had fun writing it. 
> 
> I'm in a distinctly Christmas-y mood right now, so if you have any Christmas prompts you want me to try, please send them my way! Tumblr->> withhishands.tumblr.com


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